Sunday, December 13, 2009

Seems my blog is beginning to look a lot like Adrastos', what with the holiday vids and all. Especially this past week, where I've been running 'round like a chicken with its head off trying to get things ready for my son's birthday and Hannukah. As it is, the gifts that need to go out to family and out-of-town friends haven't been sent out yet - thank God Hannukah is eight nights long. This week has really been the week I needed to do what my sister-in-law's holiday gift to me says - step back and use the F%$!-It Bucket. It works. It really does. I highly recommend it. I'm gonna make one for a relative of mine, 'cause I think she'd appreciate it quite a bit...after I give her the Basin Street Records CD...does anybody else think giving a woman a Jeremy Davenport CD might suddenly imply the giftee is a cougar in some way? And why does an older woman liking younger men have to have such a moniker anyway? Could be worse, I guess, like lecher, but the implications that something is somehow off about older women with younger men is still there. Why the hell can't people just be with who we wanna be with and have everybody else stay out of it unless bodily harm is involved?

See, you can't just give a gift anymore...you have to think about context, pop culture, and semantics atop the individual giftees likes and dislikes. AUGGGH!!! Pardon me while I grab me some motherf&%!ing candy.

So my parents send my son a marble run maze that takes a PhD to put together (You think I'm pulling your leg - it's a seventy-page instruction book.) I feel a major sugar high coming on.

So this week fittingly ends with a biblical downpour that cancels one Hannukah party for my son, keeps me at home from another Hannukah party, ensures that only five kids come to whack a rocket pinata at my son's birthday party, and just generally freaks out my dog. It was dump the candy from the bucket and fill it with alcoholic beverages time.


Yeah, I'm recovering. Barely. Pray for me.

1 comment:

saintseester said...

I will surely pray for you; and, I have to get one of those buckets.